At the End

Day’s End, Watercolor on paper, 11×14″
(c)2008 Dora Sislian Themelis

Here I am at the last week in The Artist’s Way 12 week course.  And I’m not happy about it.  I enjoyed reading each chapter and trying to do all the tasks.  I looked forward to writing the three Morning Pages of long-hand, stream of consciousness thoughts.  I had started a journal anyway, but this gave my writing a purpose and a direction.  Never mind that I called myself stupid, you idiot, and jerk most days in those pages.  The writing habit emptied my brain of nonsense and helped keep a tidy space all up in there! 

The weekly tasks were difficult for me to keep up with though.  I plan go back to various weeks and complete them.  I know they were there to help, but somehow I managed to avoid many tasks.  I don’t know why.  Did I resist doing them?  It seems it’s normal for creative people to throw obstacles in our own path because doing the task is scary.  Moving ahead puts us off sometimes, so we resist.

 Anyway, I’m thinking I won’t really be done with the course just yet.  And the Artist’s Date.  Time to play all by myself!  That was an absolute pleasure when I pinned myself self down to indulge in it.  At each week’s end was a check-in that asked if we did the Morning Pages every day, did we do the self-pampering Artist’s Date, if so, what?  These two things will have to become a “must do”. 

At a gathering this weekend someone asked me what I did.  I said I was an artist and talked about my paintings and handmade items.  The woman I was speaking to was awestruck and began planning for me to show at some venue.  I found myself saying Yes!  I gave out my handy business card.  I was so ready!  The Artist’s Way talks about synchronicity and there it was.  Things were just falling into place as if it were meant to be.  Before reading this book I may not have been so bold or so ready.

If I stick with it, art will easily become a larger part of my day, every day.  Art as process, art as play.  The course says creativity requires faith, which means we give up control.  But giving up control is scary and we resist.  The resistance is the block on the path to creativity.  That quiet internal Yes! is what leads us on the right path.  So I’m sticking with the Artist’s Way plan and I’m just going to keep on saying Yes!

Back In the Studio

Playing in the studio again the other day trying to make it a daily habit.  Eventually, I’ll get in there for a couple hours each day.  Until that habit kicks in I’m thankful for the times I do find myself at my desk instead of in the kitchen.

I’ve been wanting to visit the local art supply store to look over some new watercolor paints.  The old tubes I had were dried up.  The new ones I had didn’t have the range of colors I really wanted.  I don’t want to resort to my travel set because then I’d need to replace those pans, too.

When you buy an introductory set of five tubes they  don’t always offer the colors you want.  Strange colors I would never buy are included.  So I need to supplement the sets with more paints.  Some how I can’t get to the store!  Is it a block?  Am I putting other things in my way so I never get there?  I don’t know, but the great thing is that I painted anyway in spite of the weird colors.

Five large tubes of MamieriBlu and twelve tiny tubes of Holbein paints is what I have.  The MamieriBlu are wonderfully creamy and hold up nice while painting.  The Holbein are also nice to work with.  I had my eyes on a set of Russian Yarka paints. 

However, some wonderful fellow artists on the Etsy shop forums gave me great info on them and I decided to stick with what I have.  I don’t feel like spending good money on inferior quality paint.

Off to the studio to look at the disaster of a painting I did last week.  The Artist Way course says bad paintings point the way to a different style.  Ok, so I did a junky painting.  I felt like thowing paint on the paper in an effort to abstract the marigold work. 

Well, let’s say it looked like a mess of color.  Instead of ditching it, I went back to it and tried adding line, blotching some color out and generally playing with it.  Just a play date in the studio.

Maybe it wasn’t what I had in mind, but a good effort anyway.  I’m not that embarrassed to show it.  Thankfully, things sometimes work out in the end if you try again.

Time

Time is fleeting.  We keep wasting it, trying to make it up, see stretches of it, and watch  it just fly by.  We spend most of it just doing nothing.  But if we’re the person at home, the one responsible for house and family, the CEO of the household, we’ve got to figure out how to spend that time very wisely to get things done. 

I stink at it.  I get so sidetracked by the every day stuff, that I miss opportunities of time to be my creative self.  What’s up with that?

Somehow I have to schedule in the “me” time.  Time to make my art.  Time to be just me.  I like “just me” too.  I’m very comfortable being alone with my own self. 

Lately, I’ve been reading The Artist’s Way, by Julia Cameron.  Her book is a 12 week course on finding the artist within that’s been lost along the way while having a life.  More than a course, it’s a recovery for artists who need to find their way in the creative world, again.  It’s very interesting for me.  I’m up to week 3.  Cameron suggests making time for an “Artist Date”, spending time with the inner artist to do something fun, no third parties invited.  Ok, sounds good, but when do I have this date with myself?

Let it be said right now, I should be at week 5, but as usual, I can’t find the time to do the tasks and move on. 

Ok, so I’m trying, right?