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Thoughtful Thursday

“Don’t wait. The time will never be just right.” -Napoleon Hill

I’ve been asked to paint cherry blossoms. Actually I was originally asked to paint them on a bedroom wall in a young friend’s home where she wants to have a quiet, meditative corner. As much as I like to look at murals, I’m kind of uneasy about painting one myself. It’s the idea of putting love into something that someday, someone will eventually marr by throwing a roller of paint on top of it.

When I was a kid my artist father painted a beautiful Japanese garden scene on the basement walls, all around the whole space, which was also his studio. It had flowers, cherry blossoms on trees, birds, butterflies here and there, and in the center on the longest wall, a foot-bridge. He painted it right on the cinderblock walls and we never had the basement finished off with paneling like people do. It was an oasis of calm and beauty.

Years later my parents sold the house. I was horrified that the new owners might very well cover up that mural and the heart that went into it. What I really wanted to do was throw black paint all over, but I didn’t.

I told my friend I’d rather paint on something that is portable. At least framed art can move with you. Yes, she wants cherry blossoms to create a sense of calm, “zen” as she called it.

Combing through my swipe file, I came up with a few photos of cherry blossoms, Asian gardens, Washington D.C. blooms, and had them ready at my desk to work on today. After dinner I needed a pencil from my desk and took a look at the pics.

Some how I ended up sitting at my desk sketching out my idea. Watercolors are calming, I thought, and available. I dabbed the new brush I just bought in some color, trying to be mindful of areas I wanted to keep bright white. Methodically, I went around with the brush lightly painting in the background. By the time I decided to stop it was 8:30PM!

In the midst of all the holiday hype, Christmas shopping and baking, I’m looking forward to this painting. I don’t know if it’s the wash of the colors or the cherry blossoms themselves, but I just might have found zen.

Process Painting

A good lesson I learned from The Artist’s Way was that it’s acceptable to go into the studio with no idea what will happen once I get there, if anything. I used to think I had to have a plan, execute that plan, and end up with a pleasing outcome. Honestly, I think I set myself up for failure with that thought because I’d end up doing everything else except go to my desk. In my head I rebelled against it because I just wanted to fool around with the paint, doodle, and do “nothing”. Now I know I’m better off doing “nothing” and maybe I’ll come out with “something”. I know, wacky artist in the house!

The thing is when I doodled and did what I thought was nothing, I’d be happier. It was fun and didn’t feel like working. That’s one thing about doing The Artist’s Way course is it makes you become aware and steers you towards the process of art which could lead to exciting ideas. It makes you feel like playing again another day and see what happens next.

I’ve been playing with watercolors for a while so they’re readily available to me. I love oil painting, but since I cleaned my palette a few years ago I haven’t been able to start up again. I bought a couple of small stretched canvases recently so maybe something will happen with them soon. For now, it’s watercolor. I just thought I’d see how the paint reacts with different brushes, wet paper or dry, what will happen to the paint when I add one color next to previously applied colors. Playing with the medium to see how controllable, or not, it is.

Beach at Dusk ©2000 Dora Sislian Themelis
11×14 Watercolor

With no agenda, painting was a pleasure. I let the watercolors dry and went back to look at what I painted. When I saw some little idea of a landscape I went in with more paint and pulled out small ideas of the sand, shore and dunes. I painted beach fencing with small brush strokes and defined the beach a bit.

It was a good session in the studio. If I had thought ahead what I was going to do there I might not have felt so comfortable. Lesson learned: process, play.

I’m a Slacker!

Yeah, okay, I said I was at the end of The Artist’s Way, but I’m not done with it. Totally, not done with the course in Week 12. How can I be done if I didn’t do the tasks? I’m a slacker! Is there a good reason why I can’t get it together over here, or what? Okay, so I’m in a pouty, stomping my foot mood. Blah. Didn’t do the tasks, didn’t have the artist date, didn’t paint. I did do Morning Pages every day. I fooled around with some beads and made a new bracelet, but that’s not what I wanted to do this week. Now Christmas is coming and I barely did anything about that! I need to make a list, but I already have a list and I can’t stick to it! I’ll end up with a list of lists! I need to take a deep breath, in, hold, and out.

How do you handle it when you have so many things to do and can’t get to any of them? I get one thing done and forget the other. I do the other, and forget the next. I make one necessary phone call and don’t have time for the other call. And then I forget to make the other call all together. This is bad! Am I ever going to be free of these “things” and just spend the day painting? Nah, don’t think so.

I remember my last semester in college when we didn’t need to be in class to paint. We were to have a meeting with the professor once a month for a critique of the work we were doing at home or where ever we were painting. Weeks were passing and I felt like I had all the time in the world. I was doing everything but painting, Daydreaming of painting was more like what I was doing. Thinking about what I wanted to paint while the time passed. What else was I doing? I don’t even know. Other things were happening, I was at home as a commuter student, so–I don’t know! It’s a blank.

Then one day I received a postcard about when the meeting with the professor would take place. It was going to be that week. Yikes! I had nothing! I knew what I was supposed to be working on and decided in a flash to get to it. My prof had previously told me to paint bigger! I tend to paint big in too small a space. Every time I painted bigger he’d say, Paint Bigger! So I got out the roll of canvas I had, kicked it out on the floor of my basement and where it stopped I cut it. I painted and painted, all day and into the night. Five feet high by nine feet long later I was done! Did I say I work well under pressure? Well I do. Doesn’t mean it’s a good thing.

Who could stretch such a big canvas in a small space? I painted it flat, rolled up the damp oil painting, and threw it in my car to take it to my class. Well, the professor was thrilled with my BIG work. Eventually, I painted four more like that. They were color studies and as I went on to each I used the minimum of colors to get the same effect. They were beautiful. But did I have to be shocked into doing what I needed to do? What’s with that? I worked as if someone was chasing me with a lit torch. It’s too stressful and panicky.

I’m trying to avoid that kind of panic in my life. But I don’t think I’m going to change much. Someone once asked me what I was like years ago and what made me think I was going to be much different now? I guess I’m still the same person, but I’d like to think I could change a couple of things, right?

Photos for Friday

After Rain ©)2009 Dora Sislian Themelis

While having a shoe shopping adventure in NYC this past June, a wild wind and rain storm was going on outside. When it was over, the clouds, low in the sky, looked like cotton balls tinged with the hues of the setting sun. I just felt like a last look at warm weather before the winter really sets in here.

Thought for Thursday

“Creativity is the sudden cessation of stupidity” –Edwin Land

Drums and Drawing

Teacher ©Dora Sislian Themelis

When my sons were younger they had the opportunity to attend a class to learn to play an ethnic drum called the doumbek. The doumbek has origins in Greece and the Middle Eastern world. My oldest was, and still is, very musical and plays a variety of traditional Greek instruments.

This drum was the first instrument he showed an interest in as my Armenian father owned one. He’d let my son play and he was pretty good at it for a kid. The younger son is also musical, but he just liked to fool around, not serious about it at all. They both have that creative gene, right-brain thing, though.

Teacher in Color
©Dora Sislian Themelis

Since they were kids, I had to drive them to the class, which was almost thirty minutes from our house. Well, I decided that if I’m driving, I’m taking drawing tools with me. No sense having all that action and not get it on paper. Unfortunately, the first time I drove my kids to the lesson I forgot my sketchbook and pencils. I found a lined notebook paper, grabbed a pen and just started doodling. I could kick myself because the doodle I drew of one of the students came out great and she wanted it for herself!

Drum Lesson ©Dora Sislian Themelis

The next week I came prepared. I brought my sketchbook, pencils, and some Nu-Pastels. It was a very exciting drawing adventure. There was music, action, and the students were of different ages and personas. Drawing moving people isn’t easy. I had to decide the general direction of the pose and work from there.

Helen ©Dora Sislian Themelis

Hands and bodies kept moving, heads were bobbing, feet tapping to the beats, stopping and starting. Nothing like the short poses in life drawing class with a model who stands still for a few minutes and then changes the pose. This movement was non-stop. But it was great to be caught up in the moment with the drum beats blasting. Very energetic.

The teacher, the students and some observers were my models each week. While the others had their doumbek lesson, I was having my own lesson in observing and drawing the moving figure. It was a great time.

Doumbek Class ©Dora Sislian Themelis

At the End

Day’s End, Watercolor on paper, 11×14″

Here I am at the last week in The Artist’s Way 12 week course. And I’m not happy about it. I enjoyed reading each chapter and trying to do all the tasks. I looked forward to writing the three Morning Pages of long-hand, stream of consciousness thoughts. I had started a journal anyway, but this gave my writing a purpose and a direction. Never mind that I called myself stupid, you idiot, and jerk most days in those pages. The writing habit emptied my brain of nonsense and helped keep a tidy space all up in there!

The weekly tasks were difficult for me to keep up with though. I plan go back to various weeks and complete them. I know they were there to help, but somehow I managed to avoid many tasks. I don’t know why. Did I resist doing them? It seems it’s normal for creative people to throw obstacles in our own path because doing the task is scary. Moving ahead puts us off sometimes, so we resist.

Anyway, I’m thinking I won’t really be done with the course just yet. And the Artist’s Date. Time to play all by myself! That was an absolute pleasure when I pinned myself self down to indulge in it. At each week’s end was a check-in that asked if we did the Morning Pages every day, did we do the self-pampering Artist’s Date, if so, what? These two things will have to become a “must do”.

At a gathering this weekend someone asked me what I did. I said I was an artist and talked about my paintings and handmade items. The woman I was speaking to was awestruck and began planning for me to show at some venue. I found myself saying Yes! I gave out my handy business card. I was so ready! The Artist’s Way talks about synchronicity and there it was. Things were just falling into place as if it were meant to be. Before reading this book I may not have been so bold or so ready.

If I stick with it, art will easily become a larger part of my day, every day. Art as process, art as play. The course says creativity requires faith, which means we give up control. But giving up control is scary and we resist. The resistance is the block on the path to creativity. That quiet internal Yes! is what leads us on the right path. So I’m sticking with the Artist’s Way plan and I’m just going to keep on saying Yes!

Back In the Studio

Playing in the studio again the other day trying to make it a daily habit. Eventually, I’ll get in there for a couple hours each day. Until that habit kicks in I’m thankful for the times I do find myself at my desk instead of in the kitchen.

I’ve been wanting to visit the local art supply store to look over some new watercolor paints. The old tubes I had were dried up. The new ones I had didn’t have the range of colors I really wanted. I don’t want to resort to my travel set because then I’d need to replace those pans, too.

When you buy an introductory set of five tubes they don’t always offer the colors you want. Strange colors I would never buy are included. So I need to supplement the sets with more paints. Some how I can’t get to the store! Is it a block? Am I putting other things in my way so I never get there? I don’t know, but the great thing is that I painted anyway in spite of the weird colors.

Five large tubes of MamieriBlu and twelve tiny tubes of Holbein paints is what I have. The MamieriBlu are wonderfully creamy and hold up nice while painting. The Holbein are also nice to work with. I had my eyes on a set of Russian Yarka paints.

However, some wonderful fellow artists on the Etsy shop forums gave me great info on them and I decided to stick with what I have. I don’t feel like spending good money on inferior quality paint.

Off to the studio to look at the disaster of a painting I did last week. The Artist Way course says bad paintings point the way to a different style. Ok, so I did a junky painting. I felt like thowing paint on the paper in an effort to abstract the marigold work.

Well, let’s say it looked like a mess of color. Instead of ditching it, I went back to it and tried adding line, blotching some color out and generally playing with it. Just a play date in the studio.

Maybe it wasn’t what I had in mind, but a good effort anyway. I’m not that embarrassed to show it. Thankfully, things sometimes work out in the end if you try again.

Photo Friday

Figure 14×24″ Pastel on toned paper

Self Portrait 14×24″ Pastel on toned paper

Musicians 14×24″ Pastel on toned paper